A broadcasting giant, and a phenomenal voice, and everything else. Rest in Peace.
Perhaps this is too romantic of a view, as these things always are. But this speech will make you cry because you want so badly for it to be true.
Archive for the 'Games People Play' Category
In our last column, ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© and Gregor both ask where everyone has gone.
As usual, we have no useful answers to this, so instead we turn to the Oracle itself, Jim Thome’s (possibly fake) Twitter account:
DO YOU GUYS WANT TO KNOW THE AWFUL TRUTH ABOUT THE INTERWEBS OR DO YOU WANT TO SEE JIM JAM HIT SOME DINGERS?
I believe the answer is clear. Let us further explore this wisdom. On Salinger:
I NEVER DID UNDERSTAND WHY YOU WOULD PLACE YOUR CATCHER ON SOME BREAD
A no-trade clause, perhaps?
I HOPE YOU AREN’T SERIOUS ABOUT WANTED FISTED CUFFS, @FAKEOZZIE. JIMMERS IS A LOVER NOT A FIG
Fisted Cuffs. We sense an impending fashion trend. And figs
And, a further sign that the Pork Snorkel is slowly seeping into the sports culture:
I WOULD LIKE TO ADMIT TO THE USAGE OF HAM TO HELP ME HIT LOTS OF DINGERS
And immediately following:
YOUR SUPPORT MAKES JIMMERS FEEL BETTER ABOUT HIS USAGE OF CURED MEATS TO GAIN A COMPETITIVE ADVANTAGE
While we do not normally condone posting in all caps, but we feel it is justified in this case. Commenters take note: this is only acceptable in cases of poking fun at sports fans. Example.
If you have any questions, I am certain Mr. Thome will be happy to answer them. DINGERS.
I presume he would do an equally good bad random arbitrary job. Yet this is a billion dollar industry.
From ESPN’s Gamecast of Brazil-South Africa, likely not by an American.
Exhibit A:
And another thing I’ve just noticed. The very front of Dunga’s hair hides the baldness that lies behind it. Good effort, but not good enough.
Exhibit B:
Alves, who had been eyeing the situation up as though he wanted to start a fight with it, bends a brilliant free kick around the edge of a wall that was perhaps a man short, clips the right hand post half way up, and goes in. He pulls up his shirt to reveal a tattoo of his name and is booked, hopefully for the poorness of his taste.
Exhibit C:
I know I’ve slated him tonight, but I do like Dunga’s velvet jacket, although I wouldn’t wear it.
For jinx/anti-jinx, read forward/backward. For anti-jinx/jinx read backward/forward.
Pinko Punko wrote:
You were saving that.
Ear Rocks. Or Tawny Kitaen.
Uncanny Canadian wrote:
naegleria fowleri
Pinko Punko wrote:
Ringworm
Uncanny Canadian wrote:
Spider incident
Pinko Punko wrote:
no, the classic baseball accident that is some falling down drunk or horsing around accident that is explained as “falling out of bed” or “slipping on ice”
Uncanny Canadian wrote:
Also, appendicitis.
Pinko Punko wrote:
And throws to the wrong base on a play where it is unclear where to get the out- and other box score unknowns.
Uncanny Canadian wrote:
Picked off twice, and leaves 3rd base too early tagging-up on crucial game-tying run.
Pinko Punko wrote:
3 failures to convert DP in the field
Uncanny Canadian wrote:
8 whiffs, 10 GIDP, 6 popups. What have we done????
Pinko Punko wrote:
With a 38 LOB
Uncanny Canadian wrote:
I see a 2-24 in his near future, yes.
Pinko Punko wrote:
we just jinxed him, didn’t we
Uncanny Canadian wrote:
No, we haven’t had that discussion, and that is my bad. Lowrie is awesome. I think he is very much in the Pedroia kind of mold – doesn’t strike out much, has some patience, and can scatter hits around. He is putting up super solid numbers right now. Very impressive to me is the 31 RBIs for 44 hits. He’s come through big. I also like the 0.377 OBP.
Pinko Punko wrote:
Have we discussed how Lowrie is an awesome contributor?