Archive for the 'Incivility' Category

KNOCK KNOCK

Published
by
Pinko Punko
on May 3, 2010
in Emu Alert, Extra Meta, Foodstuffs, Incivility, On Beyond Emus, Reader Feedback and T'obag
. 21 Comments

Who’s there?

It is I, KING OF ALL YELP.

I reproduce, here for your pleasure:

Mrs. Fields donation of 3 cookies …
Category: Other

04
20 hours ago Linda L. says:

Thank you Mrs. Fields Cookies for your generous donation of 3 cookies for
our fundraising event for Retinal Research. Your generous donation will
surely make an impact on this foundation’s research.

I understand that our event didn’t “fit” your donation guidelines; but to send
a coupon for three cookies is insulting and insensitive.

61
19 hours ago Amanda “MAGOO” M. says:

Well, can I have the coupon then?

Elite ’10 209158
19 hours ago from Yelp for iPhone Mike S. says:

Dude. Wrong site. I can see how the red might confuse you….

Here here’s a ball to play with.

Elite ’10 284776
18 hours ago Jim “The Traveler” U. says:

You requested a free donation, they made one. You deem the donation not good enough for reasons unspecified and have chosen to inform all of the amateur restaurant reviewers in the greater New York city area about this. Why? And why do you feel Mrs. Fields should be obligated to give you anything? They sounded respectable enough from my standpoint.

Elite ’10 46219
18 hours ago Kate “the present king of france” T. says:

Review Mrs. Fields?

Elite ’10 133127
18 hours ago Scott “suburb dweller” P. says:

Congratulations Jim, youre an asswipe

People talk about almost anything in these threads, is there a requirement Im not aware of? Or maybe she would have preferred no donation rather than cookie coupons, which is an insult really.

Elite ’10 284776
17 hours ago Jim “The Traveler” U. says:

It is now an insult to receive something for free if it less than what you expected? I guess Peter D has been dogging me all this time by allowing me to attend elite events and not pouring Cristal down my throat.

@Scott P

Yes, people talk about anything in these threads. I am talking about why I fail to understand what the big deal is. Try to keep up my little man.

61
17 hours ago Amanda “MAGOO” M. says:

Congratulations Scott, your an asswipe.

Elite ’10 182209
15 hours ago Janeen “The Fem-Bot Edition” B. says:

Congratulations Amanda, you’re an asswipe.

Elite ’10 317461
15 hours ago Jaime “just plays one on yelp” M. says:

Congratulations everybody. You’ve earned 3 Mrs. Fields cookies.

9517
13 hours ago Marjan “sans souci” G. says:

Mrs. Fields is passe at best, the cookies are too greasy and
sweet and are about 800 calories each.
Think of it as lucky that they only gave three cookies.
Who needs them !

Elite ’10 46219
5 hours ago Kate “the present king of france” T. says:

800 calories? Rockin’. I could eat 2.5 each day and be set.

Super secret hat tip to e-mail helper!

I blame fish

Published
by
Ombudswagon
on April 12, 2010
in Aside, BLAME™, Blog Nemeses, Cobagitation, Emu Alert, Incivility, Internet Fixing, On Beyond Emus, Reader Feedback, Rush and fish vs shorebird
. 64 Comments

There have been multiple complaints regarding this blog and the propensity for extensive arguments. The Ombuds collective acknowledges that arguments must be avoided at all costs as they have a tendency to make David Broder uncomfortable. It has also been noted that these arguments are taking place without the proper safety training as required by Article E, Section M, Subheading U. So before we continue, it is required that you all view this argument training video:

Fish stole the video. Let us proceed then. A rigorous statistical analysis of the argument phenomenon that is occurring in the greater 3Bulls(!) blogosphere revealed only one  common causative modality with a P Value reaching significance (p=0.0): fish. Yes, it appears fish is a major root cause of argumentation. I am afraid that an intervention is required.

There is a problem however. How does one actually intervene with a chronic arguer? The first step is to recognize the signs of the arguing addict to be sure the diagnosis is correct:

1) Does the individual head into the bathroom carrying a copy of Debaters Weekly and mumbling something about becoming a “Master”?

2) Do you have to put parental controls on the TV to block The McLaughlin Group?

3) Must you never say the words “designated hitter” out loud in his or her presence?

4) Have you heard enough about salt already?

Given criteria such as those above, it is clear to the Ombuds that fish has a serious problem and runs the risk of making David Broder cry if he does not get the help that he needs.

This Ombud has a few recommended actions:

1) pick up apparatus; use apparatus, play video of Kennedy/Nixon debate while playing Rush at full volume.

2) mark fish’s IP as spam and then initiate an argument between Mandos and Plover on the post-modern theory as applied to the inherent sexism of Linux use in the movie Avatar.

3) Read Matt Yglesias’ justification for the Iraq War out loud and apply strong electroshock every time he audibly snorts.

4) Cancel his subscriptions to Z Magazine and the Utne Reader. Force him to subscribe to and read TNR, Slate, and The Nation. Refuse to discuss or consider any points of view other than David Corn’s.

5) Any time he brings up Chomsky, say that “Jonah Goldberg really has a more interesting take on this topic”.

6) Agree with everything he says. (this may be an unworkable solution)

I am sure with aggressive treatment, we can get fish to allow someone else to speak once in a while. If he continues on his current path, he is in danger of using up all the letters on the internets. Let’s get him re-socialized and ready to become a productive member of society again. Won’t you help fish instead of cursing him?

A Tarantino Film Begging to be Made

Published
by
Pinko Punko
on March 28, 2010
in *BOOP*, Cobag in Chief, Cobags, In the News and Incivility
. 19 Comments

An Inglourious Basterds style revenge flick where our protagonists set their deserving sights on Pedophile, Inc. Yes, Andrew Sullivan, the Roman Catholic Church. A church that “should know better.” Cinematic violence and gore filling the gaping maws of our disgust and thirst for justice. Cue Bill Donohue’s head for the explosion line. What a horrible thought. How could anyone?

Film it, chundernoggins.


Sinéad O’Connor – WAR – SNL – For more of the funniest videos, click here

Update: A ray of sanity on Hiatt’s Op-Ed page. O’Connor covers the latest.

An Exciting New Feature of Three Bulls!

Published
by
Gregor Samsa
on January 5, 2010
in Canadian Curling Association Cobaggery, Cobagitation, Emu Alert, Extra Meta, Flights of Fancy, GRAPEFRUIT CHUPACABRA!!!!!!, Hijacked!, Incivility, Ombudsman Heritage Week, Ombudspersonpantsmoose, Pork Snorkel, Reader Feedback, Shenanometer Pegged Needle, Snacktators, Take 5 and The Pleasures of Moosology
. 35 Comments

ombuddy seal of approval

Introducing the Ombud… Seal of Approval (OSA)!

Do you, gentle and not so gentle readers, often find yourself approaching new Three Bulls! posts with trepidation verging on fear?

Do you find yourself wondering:

Will there be an Ombud… available if I have any questions, concerns or complaints about this post?

Have the photographs in this post been analyzed by trained professionals for hidden meanings, nuance and most importantly matters related to the state of the union?

Will anything be harmed in anyway by the content of or omissions from this post?

Are the authors of this post sufficiently non partisan?

Does this post contain verified facts and/or science related to politics, life or other contentious issues without presenting the reader with opposing wackadoodle beliefs for balance?

Can the terms “teabag” and “teabagging,” as used in this post, be interpreted in an inappropriate manner?

Does this post contain opinion?

Have the authors considered every side of every coin?

Is this post civil or will it lead to incivility?

Will this post hurt my feelings or the feelings of others?

What’s the number of the complaint line and what happens if it is busy?

Were John McCain and Joe Lieberman briefed on the content of this post?

Will I get hungry part way through this post?

Will I get it?

Continue reading ‘An Exciting New Feature of Three Bulls!’

Re-Rebuttal Butt Butte (half)

Published
by
Ombudsglooob
on June 7, 2009
in Canadian Curling Association Cobaggery, Didn't we smite this yesterday?, Do we have a Phil Collins category yet?, Do we have a Tucker Carlson category yet?, GRAPEFRUIT CHUPACABRA!!!!!! and Incivility
. 12 Comments

Based on recent events, I believe a formal response would be salutary.  Helpful, even.

After the recent kerfuffle over an introductory Ombudsglooob post that was deemed non-ombudshelpfullike, the OARB came down on me like a ton of soggy chicken feathers.  Also, the CCA sent several large stones hurtling through my front door.  I believe I even pissed off the AFL-CIO and NAMBLA.

Item the First: I have discovered that I was in grievous error in describing Certain Various Citrus Monsters as Imaginary.  Indeed, I was visited not only by the Grapefruit Chupacabra three nights ago, but the following night by Tucker the Orange and last night tag teamed by a Frankenlemon and what can only be described as a Key Lime Zombie.  we had long discussions; while edifying, it must be said that Citrus Monsters are not sparkling conversationalists.

Seriously, it was like A Christmas Carol as written by Anita Bryant.  A Citrus Carol.  I fully expect to be visited tonight by an overgrown Mutant Kumquat to infect me with Citrus Canker, unless I bribe a street urchin to go buy me the biggest Pork Snorkel in the shop window.

So, in short, it must be conceded that Citrus Monsters do, in fact, exist, and are willing to disrupt your sleep patterns with long, Ben Stein like monologues if necessary.

Item the Second: The COBA has decried the lack of professionaism, helpfulness, and generally undignified state of 3Bulls.  Now, in my defense, I must state that my OmbudsContract did not include the words “Dignity”  “Professional”  or “Helpful”; indeed, it only contained one “whereas”  and three “ats”.  However, there was mention of “shenanigans”, “cobagitation”, “half-assedness” and several times, “Zardoz”.  Also, a whole section was entitled “When All Hell Breaks Loose”.  And even though I felt there was not enough mention of “Salary”, “Vacation”, “Cuba Libre Lunches” or “Legal Defence”, the agreement was generally satisfactory on both sides.

It must needs be pointed out, however, that failure of execution is not only part of the day to day operation of this dark-blue bloggo, but that it is in fact, a time honored Tradition.  I submit as evidence this Words of Wisdom, seen recently in the sidebar:

3bullsloozers1

I maintain that as Ombudsglooob, I was merely conforming to the 3Bulls Mission Statement.

Item the Thrid:  In the spirit of Ombuddsing, a visitor plaintively asked “Where’s My Pudding?”.  The dessertly nature of this request makes our tempombudsheart fairly burst.  Following on a clue left in a subsequent comment, we discovered that fish’s pudding, was, in fact, taken by Blue Girl.  Furthermore, she ATE IT INCORRECTLY!!  This is, of course, the prerogative of a Cookie Queen, if no less heinous for that.  Without the support of my new Citrus Monster friends, though, I am not equipped to confront this person.  Fortunately she spends all her time these days on Facebook and honking at old people. Maybe the CCA can send a Sternly Worded Letter.  Maybe Minnesota Law Firm can send a Støørnly Worded Letter.   I am going to stay the hell out of it from now on.

Item the Fourth: Phil Collins may be a talented drummer, but he is no longer Cute.  Also, he has been married AS MANY TIMES AS NEWT GINGRICH!!  Something Coming In The Air Tonight, Indeed.  Think about it, won’t you?

Fear not, friendly 3Bulls visitor and/or Reader!  An epochal Ombudspost is in the works!  It will answer half your questions.  Or maybe None.  But full-assedness is RIGHT OUT!!

[EDIT]  I believe I am offended at the Ombudsnick I was assigned.  doesn’t matter which definition you go with.

Civilité, Fraternité, Insiderté

Published
by
Pinko Punko
on May 19, 2009
in In the News and Incivility
. 8 Comments

I think it would be worth a brunch meeting at least.

I don’t think she should have eaten a ton of bricks, but the laziness at play here with the previous monstrosities on display by Our Maureen suggest she should have been disposed of long ago, and the current crime be noted specifically in reference to her previous crimes, an excuse for greatest hits.

Of course the punch was pulled. To do otherwise would be to refuse to pee in fish’s cornflakes.

Autoresponse

Published
by
Three Bulls
on May 16, 2009
in Incivility and THIS BLOG IS FOR CHOADY CHOADS
. 21 Comments

This blog has noticed that many of its soi disant commenters have begun posting spam comments. While there has always been a slow trickle of such comments on the site, there has recently been a strong upsurge in this activity.

This blog has no choice but to conclude that most commenters (and probably all of the putative authors) are actually cleverly designed spambots which were programmed to post amusing things for a few years to build their credibility before sneakily erupting into a marketing campaign for eldritch leafy vegetables, cracker-related perversions, and soon, no doubt, even Chocolate Skittles.1

This blog has never before encountered such a wanton abuse of internet civility or such a grave breach of the norms of civilisation. Truly the modern world has fallen. First there was the chaos of the French Revolution, then vertically integrated corporations, then processed cheese food product, and now this. Oh how the ashes of better times lie thick upon the world.

This blog sees no other way forward than to pack up its Earth Wind & Fire 8-tracks and shiny hologram Alexandre Dumas posters, leave the field of discourse to the hooligans of spam, and find some refuge in the hope that civilisation may some day be rebuilt at least to the level of, say, Usenet. This blog shan’t be back.


  1. Note that in saying this we do not want impugn legitimate missives from sincere lovers of phylogenetically confused organisms, citrus fruits, or cracker-based emissions. [back]

Dead Ant, Dead Ant

Published
by
Gregor Samsa
on March 29, 2009
in Blog Nemeses, Didn't we smite this yesterday? and Incivility
. 59 Comments

I don’t hate Somerby. I do read his blog but generally only a few posts a month and that’s all I can take.

Somerby has chosen a very unpopular job: a progressive who spends a fair amount of his time criticizing the “liberal” and “progressive” media and political establishments. For that he is to be commended. The establishment of the left isn’t faultless and needs to be criticized. As the influence of the blogoshpere has increased I think that Somerby has naturally tended to pay more attention to it. Where it all turns to custard is the way in which Somerby goes about his criticism. Yes I’m talking about the dreaded ‘tone’ and also the repetitiveness of his criticism. I don’t know if his shtick is meant to be humorous but it no longer tickles my funny bone. I’m over it.

It really has come to the point, where to my mind at least, some Daily Howler posts are unrelenting in their name calling and rather weak on factual criticism. Somerby makes some good points but only seldom is the criticism constructive. And I think that’s primarily where he falls flat. Let’s face it, the right-wing media and blogosphere could care less about what Somerby thinks or writes about them. The left-wing blogosphere (his ‘nominal allies’) and to a lesser extent the left-wing media probably do care but he often comes across as such an asshole that he ironically makes it easier to walk away from such criticism. I feel like he pisses away his best chance of making a difference. Yes maybe his targets need to toughen up but maybe Somerby also needs to take a step back from his blog persona and think about what it is he’s trying to accomplish and what the best way to accomplish it is. He’s got the chops but what I attribute to bitterness and anger take away from his criticism. They make it indigestible.

Lately I’ve found myself reading the Daily Howler using the same metrics that Somerby himself applies to others. I don’t think that the results are that flattering for Bob. Work isn’t shown, he often plays the mind reading game, and his research, apparently impeccable for all things Gore, routinely falls flat. This is most unsatisfying for somebody that sets such a high bar for others.

I started this post a long time ago but pretty much gave up on it as laziness consumed and as the moment passed. It was about the Keith Olbermann dust up of a few months ago, which I actually didn’t follow that closely. But at the time it reminded me of a DH post of 19 February, which I found less than satisfactory. It’s probably been already covered in a much better fashion elsewhere but the original (unfinished) post is below the fold. Continue reading ‘Dead Ant, Dead Ant’

Pot Stirrage

Published
by
plover
on March 6, 2009
in Blog Nemeses, Incivility, Internet Fixing and but what the hell
. 25 Comments

More Somerbyanigans, proceed at own risk.

[George Lakoff, The Political Mind (2008).]

Progressives have accepted an old view of reason, dating back to the Enlightenment, namely, that reason is conscious, literal, logical, universal, unemotional, disembodied, and serves self-interest. As the cognitive and brain sciences have been showing, this is a false view of reason. (pp 1-2)

*

A great deal of the political strife in America and elsewhere stems from the cognitive unconscious of individual citizens. [...] We need a new, updated Enlightenment. [...]

The Old Enlightenment values were a great advance in their day. But we know so much more now than in the eighteenth century about what it means to be human, and what challenges face humanity. Our Constitution is in large part based on the intellectual tools and ideas inherited by its framers from Enlightenment thinkers. These tools and ideas are no longer adequate. They have brought us great political, social, and material wonders. And, miraculously, the framers seem to have anticipated such developments, because the dynamic democracy they designed leaves open the possibility of revolutionary change. [...]

We will need to embrace a deep rationality that can take account of, and advantage of, a mind that is largely unconscious, embodied, emotional, empathetic, metaphorical, and only partly universal. A New Enlightenment would not abandon reason, but rather understand that we are using real reason—embodied reason, reason shaped by our bodies and brains and interactions in the real world, reason incorporating emotion, structured by frames and metaphors and images and symbols, with conscious thought shaped by the vast and invisible realm of neural circuitry not accessible to consciousness. (pp 13-4)

Continue reading ‘Pot Stirrage’

In which plover falls prey to the temptation to shoot fish in a barrel — not that fish

Published
by
plover
on January 23, 2009
in Cobaggery, Incivility, On Beyond Emus and Ultimate Baggery
. 15 Comments

I happened to hear the following on C-SPAN yesterday. It is from a special orders speech by Trent Franks (R-AR).

Today has been sort of a remembrance of heroes. We’ve talked a lot about George Bush, we’ve talked a lot about Abraham Lincoln. In a sense, it is so appropriate to do that on January 22, isn’t it? Because we are reminded that, just as America was used after 6,000 years of rampant slavery in the world, we were the ones that had a moral conflict with it. And yes, we had a little disagreement called the Civil War over it, but we were used of God to change this tragedy of slavery, and now it is at least discredited all over the planet. And I believe that this country will be the country that will lead the world to discredit this tragic practice of killing our children before they’re born.

My first reaction was “Why haven’t I heard of this guy before? I mean, that’s some industrial grade dumbth. That’s like Steve King level stupid.”

Continue reading ‘In which plover falls prey to the temptation to shoot fish in a barrel — not that fish’

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