Content-THE SEQUEL!!!LL!

There is nothing in the world of web logs that are not memes. The entire act of posting to your web log is in itself a meme. Some memes are labeled as such as they are the instant Sanka of web logs and cob logging. We don’t do those. However, many people have done one concerning five songs on their ipod, 8track, cd, etc. that are embarrassing. This really isn’t the true test.


The true test is songs that come on the radio that you will listen to but roll up the window so when you turn them up, it is hoped that passerbys will not share in your deep shame. I’ve discussed this before with number 1, but decided to reach deeper into the psyche.

1. Phil Collins-Sussudio

To be honest, there are more songs in this Phil pile. From Genesis there’s “That’s All”, “Abacab” and “Tonight” (COMING DOWN LIKE A MONKEY!!!!!!), and from Phil, “Take Me Home” and of course….

2. Jennifer Lopez and Ja Rule-Ain’t It Funny

Murder Inc!!!!! Try to deny that this isn’t a total joint. NANANANANA!

3. Ted Nugent-Stranglehold/Great White Buffalo

The man is a certifiable narcissistic misogynist chunderhole of immense proportions. He is truly treading water in a sea of retarded sexuality and bad poetry. Possibly single-handedly spawned the dudes going into the forest to circle jerk and be men phenomenon from the late 20th century. Claims to have never done drugs. His music is terrible. Yet up goes the window, then up goes the volume. Is it like rubbernecking at a horrible traffic accident? Only if the car is exploding and on fire. In the darkest most foul recesses of your heart, a voice says “exploding car…cool.” Welcome to hell. A.L.I.N.R. At least it’s not Rush.

4. Rush-Red Barchetta

Jesus. It is Rush. I cannot believe how terrible this song is and how it forces me to listen to it. I can identify two to three Alex Lifeson sounds on this song that I wish were in a cool song by a cool band, such as it is with the Rush. I’m sorry to Brando in advance, who’s life has been interestingly and movingly scored by what to me is the sound of certain people who I just didn’t like that much’s older brothers who I didn’t like that much. I can’t explain it. Rush takes me back to one moment in time always. Not Sifu Tweety losing his virginity [in the lost Poor Man archives, thank God, in that thread you will learn certain things about your very own cob logger], a different moment. As a young teenager, I was kind of trying out this BBYO thing. It was just this clique of kids who didn’t really care to fit in to their various schools because well none of us fit in anyway because everyone else in the whole state was Mormon. The problem was that I didn’t fit in with them either. I wasn’t old enough to be excited about drinking [breaking the rules- whoa, let’s not get radical], and I was probably scared that someone would bust out a joint. When you go from Mormon world to non-Mormon world, you realize that things are a little bit different on the “outside.” Anyhow, we’re in some kid’s basement and somebody put on Rush (most of these guys were older than me and had older brothers). All I could think about was that I just want this to be over and I never want to answer another water sports question or even see any of these people again. I can never ever like Rush. I was always a 60’s/rock/pop/punk/new wave kid. The giant hole in that existence was the prog hole.

5. Nilsson-Without You

This song is awesome, but deeply embarrassing. I can’t give anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. Seriously nothing says red wine drunk, drunk dialing, Tobias Funke shower crying than this totally amazing song.

57 Responses to “Content-THE SEQUEL!!!LL!”


  • I’ve got many, but the first that popped into my head was this.

  • Look, I really couldn’t care less about this “content.” I only come here to deposit CDCs on your bloggio. Despite the fact that they would get a higher readership if I posted them on my bloggio. Perhaps some linkage is in order? I think that would propel me into a new layer of the bloghorosphere.

  • What chuckles, the EotS linky love not enough for you? And with much less Rush hatage. Although with AG purloining the keys, much more naked man content.

    The Nilsson loves saves you PP.

  • The Uncanny Canadian

    I would like to point out that the opinions expressed in this content about Rush do not represent the view of all cob-loggers. Especially the Canadian ones.

    I would also like to point out that I not only listen to the original Without You, but the Spanish version bonus track as well. Some things are just too sublime.

  • I am sorry that Rush reminds Pinko of golden showers. I can understand the revulsion. One of my first arguments with TLB was over Rush, and yet I married her. I am a forgiving man.

    As far as songs go, hands down this is it for me. My reaction when it comes on is Cartman-esque where I am compelled to sing it.

  • Willy- 30 seconds into that song and I am loving it!

    But I understand NSA-style concerns.

  • was not was is a Windows-DOWN guilty pleasure.

  • I so love that Styx song, Brando.

  • I have to confess this one. For sure a roll up, crank up. This is a great pop song!!!

    I am CONSTANTLY hearing this one on people’s Ipod’s on BART, never who you would expect. Love it.

  • crap. let’s try that link again. here

  • The 80’s were such a fizzy, effervescent time. Can you imagine that Trio song being a hit now?

  • I’d have to agree with Kathleen on that one. I also discovered one while just in the car… it was this. Luckily the windows were already shut.

  • The ladies can get away with BLT. I think Jennifer can rock the N’order with umpunity. The Pinko does love it, but windows up.

    As for the Toxic, yeah, that is a hermertically sealed car jam.

    Also, when you are lost in Oakland and Skynyrd comes on. Also if you are lost in the Castro and Skynyrd comes on. Also if you are lost in the FiDi and Skynyrd comes on. Also if you are lost in the Mission and Skynyrd comes on. Also if you are lost in Pac Heights and Skynyrd comes on. Also if you are lost in Berkeley and Skynyrd comes on. Also if you are lost…and Skynyrd comes on.

  • I so love that Styx song, Brando.

    It is the closest to the edge of the love/hate razor for me. It makes me both want to sing at the top of my lungs and throw up a little in my mouth.

    TLB and I rocked “Bizzare Love Triangle” back in the Stone Age. I am comfortable enough in my heterosexuality to leave the windows down when that plays. Erasure, on the other hand….

  • Obviously it says a lot about the cobaggery of society that one would even think about playing some sort of music in shame or secret just because somebody thinks some dude might want to hook up with another dude.

  • If all the emus came home to roost at once, would it trigger emuageddon?
    ~

  • Blatant Words of Wisdom trolling.

  • I am comfortable enough in my heterosexuality to leave the windows down when that plays.

    But what about the Bronski Beat??

  • I totally rock the Bronski. Falsetto is nothing to be ashamed of.

  • I’ve heard that some fish spontaneously change sexes. It would rock the piscine researchers if we could demonstrate that it’s the result of gender-bending New wave viddys…

  • I would totally blast Dead or Alive, FGTH and Soft Cell while lip syncing in vamp mode. Haters can EAT IT. Then I would wonder and be annoyed about the rumors. I’m sorry but those songs are AWESOME.

  • Am I supposed to roll up the windows for this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yQoZmYUuvXw
    I suspect I wouldn’t anyway. (And in any case, I prefer this: part 1, part 2 — but that isn’t going to show up on the radio.)

    I can’t imagine rolling up the windows for New Order. (Though apparently I am supposed to be ashamed of preferring the remixed version of “Subculture” to the original.) I mean, the worst one could be accused of with regards “Bizarre Love Triangle” is neglecting their non-overplayed stuff. BLT is actually pretty good, unlike a few other tracks (“Thieves Like Us”? blecch…) (The initials “BLT” also make the song an obvious candidate for Weird Al…)

    What about this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EoZ2J4ajiOA
    I have absolutely no sociological take on how that song is regarded, but I’ve long considered it to reside in the list of perfect pop songs (another one I’ve often put in that category: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ughqjbzx2Fk ) I have no idea why I think that song is likely to have been marked down for uncoolth by the arbiters of taste that hang around outside my car window.

    Hmm, how about this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tCU8_XEqCM (Though it is one of his relatively less embarrassing lyrical efforts.) I don’t think I’m very good at this — probably socially maladjusted or some such. I’ll probably think of something a couple of days from now when this thread has faded from view. If it helps, I’ll admit to liking this Rush song a lot: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rC0u9MdHA98

    (Entirely off topic, here go watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FXHOyqHzupk )

    Jennifer, possibly the weirdest thing about that Tom Jones video is that the instrumental break includes at least two bits associated with The Art of Noise. (Still one of the great videos: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-sFK0-lcjGU and the song really holds up well in spite of (and perhaps also because of) being basically a “let’s mess with the new electronic studio toys and see what we come up with” track.)

  • Dire Straits is a neutral roller, Lisa Loeb is a roller upper. TFF is a roller downer, but you might be judged by the crowd. Dave Matthews is definitely a roller upper, if you are driving by the intersection of Three Bulls Ave. and Song of the Day Way. And I am afraid that Rush is also in the roll the eff up that window!

  • An there is always this (and everything else by them).

    but can you top this. It’s a neil young cover, believe it or not.

  • DMB are a talented bunch of musicians, and they can put together some good music, but DM is a menace to the English language. It’s not all that easy for someone to write songs in such a way that, if I like the music, they’re ruined for me by the lyrics — I’m very good at ignoring lyrics — but a lot of the time, DM is just… ghastly. He has just enough knowledge of poetic language to come up with distinctive metaphorical conceits, apparently no filter for deciding which ones work, and all the finesse of a rabid yak in applying them. When he lucks into something that fits his method, he can turn out something half decent (“Don’t Drink The Water”), or at least innocuous (“The Stone”), but as often as not everything in sight gets trampled, chewed on, and covered in malodorous yak hair (“Crash Into Me”).

  • mdh- ABBA is almost never on the radio, so it doesn’t count.

    also, we’ve done that St. Etienne on Song of the Day. In fact we would blast it like a mating call for the like minded. Roll that window down!

  • Jennifer, possibly the weirdest thing about that Tom Jones video is that the instrumental break includes at least two bits associated with The Art of Noise.

    Tom originally did the cover with The Art of Noise, but that video has been removed.

    I leave my windows down for Dave Matthews, Pinko! Grizzled rolls his eyes, but I love that little scruffy part of his voice… don’t care about the lyrics, just give me the scruffy.

    Listening to Bela first thing in the morning was a nice surprise.

  • I would like to remind the ombudsbeing that if there is a post called “The Return of Content”, we should soon see a post called, “The Return of Discontent.” Failure to do so reflects liberal bias and will result in this blog losing 587(Z)(Eleventy)(mmccii) status.

  • There should also be a post of malcontent.

  • Actually I am pretty sure that discontent can only be in the winter.

  • plover gets 100 bonus points for posting “Telegraph Road.” My favorite Dire Straits song.

    This always gets cranked if I hear it. I realize it’s only a chromosome or two away from Loverboy, but I love it nevertheless. Plus it’s my favorite use of “mama” in any rock song, including Genesis.

  • Brando knows Foreigner is problematic with 3B

  • Still not opening the door for Lou, Pinko? What if he were an artichoke? Oh… wait… that wouldn’t help. I can’t believe you’ll eat Pooplet Skittles, but no artichokes.

  • Actually I am pretty sure that discontent can only be in the winter.

    I believe that, inexplicably, it is almost time for winter fashions.

  • Disclaimer: no rickrolling.

    Thank you,

    Not The Management

  • Pinko, I’ve never told you much I like the background color of Three Bulls.

  • Is it a Rick Roll if it is almost in context?

    I think thunderpants has plausible denial. Blast.

  • A rick roll should be a form of sushi in which the filling is always avocado even if it’s been coloured to look like spicy tuna or salmon or something else.

  • A rick roll should be a form of sushi in which the filling is always avocado even if it’s been coloured to look like spicy tuna or salmon or something else.

    Except the filling isn’t avacado, it is ass.

  • ABBA is totally on the radio – especially since the rise of mama mia. I guess the movie soundtrack version is the one I should have used, but it suuuuuks. That’s embarrasing.

    Apparently I’m easily embarrassed by my music. I had no idea you did a St Etienne SOTD. I’m a bad user.

  • Double posting will break your heart.

  • i’m in yr blog, leaving mai anchor tags open!

  • the success of this sequel guarantees a trilogy

  • When Billy Rotten wrote “EotS,” I thought he meant something altogether different and I remain glad that I am no longer a contributor to a certain online World of HP Lamecraft.

  • Never gonna give you up!

    Someday I’m going to learn those mad Rick Asstley dance mooves.

    In the meantime, where’s the John McCain green screen Rick Roll?

    How about something along these lines?

    I see Brad over at the Haus of Sad is lamenting the lack McLame mockery. I’d do it myself, but I don’t even know how to photoshop.
    ~

  • Maybe the Senator can hit up the Senator from OK for one of these..

  • Why are you listening to stations that play that crap?

  • Because we don’t have satellite radio and our cars are too old to have an ipod jack and our fm dials are too crowded to use an ipod radio adapter and we don’t drive with headphones. Also, we are mysterious.

    Seitz is pretend banned until the Angels lose.

  • Well, obviously you have made some bad decisions. You are clearly being hamstrung by some sort of massive, shadowy organization that is dedicated to keeping everyone at the same level of mediocrity.

    Perhaps not incidental to the above, I heard a hilarious Ayn Rand joke at an open mic stand-up night.

  • It’s appropriate time to make a few plans for the longer term and it is time to be happy. I’ve read this post and if I may just I desire to suggest you few interesting issues or tips. Perhaps you could write next articles referring to this article. I want to read more issues about it!

  • tisa hats

    January 19, 2012 at 6:13 am

    It’s appropriate time to make a few plans for the longer term and it is time to be happy. I’ve read this post and if I may just I desire to suggest you few interesting issues or tips. Perhaps you could write next articles referring to this article. I want to read more issues about it!

    Spammer is unintentionally hilarious. Never gonna give nike shoes up! Also, I don’t see a special for Rick Astley hats?
    ~

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