Clueless

…unh…
…what?…
………where am I?….
who am I?…
So dark in here. Let me just light the candle in this candlestick.
There. [looking around]
I see a painting with a jar of mustard holding a revolver.
Interesting.
Green bowl on the table with some lovely plums. I hope nobody eats them.
There’s a knife, I could cut one up for myself…
Off to the left, I can see, what is that? Oh, a white sink with lettuce in it.
It seems to be leaking. The pipes could use a twist with a wrench. I wonder if there is one of those around here?
[stands up] Uh, my head still spins when I try to stand. Scarlet speckles invade my peripheral vision, almost blacked out. [sits down again]
I should really stay away from the tequila, my head feels like it is stuffed with a peacock.
I have no idea how I got roped into this. [looks down]

OH MY GOD!!!!eleven111!!!iii!

WHO’S PANTS ARE THESE!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

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