Section 4, paragraph 4, subparagraph q:
No ombudsman may use a pseudonym to perform his duties as an ombudsman, with the following exception for neutrality among ombudsmen: members of the COBA Coordinating Convention, and those properly accredited by its affiliate organizations (see Appendix M).
Section 1125, paragraph -2, subparagraph j:
No ombudsman who has started his work with a publication anonymously or using a pseudonym may reveal or alter his present identity.
Section 1125, paragraph -2, subparagraph k:
No ombudsman, insofar as he is aware of another pseudonymous ombudsman’s real identity or other pseudonym, may reveal any such name to non-ombudsmen.
Glossary excerpt:
Ombudsman: Sacred name of a sacred profession, referring back to the mythological role of Zardunoz the Unknown Beloved of Isis…mystical cherry pies…neutrality; considered generic term for all who fill such role, whether male, female, in other states of living, or belonging to other species. We consider ombudsman to be a gender-neutral term, like fireman.
Appendix M (in its entirety):
The Canadian Curling Association
The ombolyglomboly is kind of anal, isn’t he?
We consider ombudsman to be a gender-neutral term, like fireman.
And now ZRM has just thrown the accusation “he” into the mix.
Gender neutral?
~
No ombudsman who has started his work with a publication anonymously or using a pseudonym may reveal or alter his present identity.
Can I be known as Zombudsgloob? Or maybe OmZomOmbudsZom.
Or maybe Steve.
OMNOMNOMBUDSPANTS.
Must give tigrismus credit for that last one. Convergetnt evolution at work!
Sometimes I feel they have all of these rules just to be exclusive of the viewpoints they are supposed to nurture.
No one told me anything about nurturing viewpoints.
“Zardunoz” – I believe Ombolyglommer is calling for a Zardoz!
I have not given you any set rules, I have not given you a system.