Or, “Audients Participation.”
The oft-mocked Pitchfork, not content with the annual material PP and UC already have to work with, bestow upon us their top 200 albums of the decade.
It should be noted that the musical stylings of one Capt. CT Trollypants are mysteriously absent. We expect howls of outrage forthwith.
We are certainly not expecting our esteemed management to actually review the massive list of lists, but our darling commenters may be willing to lend a hand.
In other news, there is no news, except for these shoes. A must-have accessory for red track pants on the go.
I don’t know why but I really was not expecting Bacon Shoes.
Nobody expects Bacon Shoes!
Amongst the Three Bulls weaponry are such diverse elements as: fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency, an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope, and nice red uniforms.
Ah yes, the red uniforms.
I believe those shoes were covered in the Snag video I put up a few weeks ago, Bacon Is Good For Me. I believe you must watch until the end to see the plethora of bacony items.
This Champion slip on canvas sneaker is an undisputable wardrobe essential for every woman because of its style and comfort. It is the perfect blank canvas to design your true expression.
bacon is the most awesome thing ever.
If I were (forced by accident of employment) to run credit on this company, I have to believe that Snag would be at least a 25% owner.
~
AN actually related piece of commentary to bacon shoes coming soon. From GC!!!!!!!!!!!!
in D&D? I think I ate at least one shoe when I was expecting…
Top albums of the Decade? Another effin decade? Who let this happen?
Apparently, Pitchfork’s mission is to make me feel old and out of touch.
MORE old and out of touch, that is. Sigh.
I shall be eating their tiny, exotic-coffee-drink-infused hepcat beret-wearing hipster brains. Soon.
True story: last night I saw someone on the bus with bacon-print gumboots.
They looked soggy.
I do not understand how Mastodon make it on there.
And Austrian Death Machine isn’t ??!?!?!
SHENANIGANS!! PITCHFORKIGANS!!!
The Choppa, get to it young Jedi.
There is no try.
/Austrian Death Yoda
~
The Pitchfork list caused the needle in my shenanometer to spin around so rapidly, that it propelled itself upward and directly into my forehead, piercing my skull and possibly killing me. I fear that I may be a zombie now, but I’m not sure….
The Undead Canadian?
welcome to the Zombiehood!
I really hate those choads.
I’m fine with making the list — these things drive readership, because look, I just went there to look it over. I will even tip my hat for making it 200 albums, because that’s a clever way to be inclusive enough that they can cover their critical behinds (look, we have rap music! And stuff you’ve never heard of! And The White Stripes! Twice!) I don’t even really get that hung up on the rankings, because one man’s top 10 is another man’s 91-100. Fine.
What I cannot tolerate, however, is how those little weasels let popular trends blatantly dictate their critical rankings, all while acting like we can’t see the hand making the puppet dance. Two case studies:
A) Andrew W.K. in the top 150. TERRIBLE album. I bought it in a fit of 80s metal nostalgia and spent two weeks convincing myself it didn’t suck before realizing I was wrong. P-Fork, to their credit, gave it a 0.6. They saw right through it. Yet, there it is, staring at me on a Best of the Newmanium list with blood running down it’s nose, with nary an explanation that they ripped the cartilage out of this when it was released. Why the flip flop? I suspect because W.K. has been reborn as a motivational speaker and neo-classical pianist, so clearly this album must not be a crusted-over crap pie unsuitable for a Jock Jams compilation, right?
B) And You Will Know Us By The Trail of Dead. P-Fork gave it a rare 10 and made it their album of the year. While one can quibble with the perfect score, I think it’s one of the best albums of the decade, and one that showcases a level of ambition sorely lacking from many musicians today. However, their subsequent releases grew worse and worse, and now this 10.0 got the decimal moved to the right and ranked at 100. Again, with no explanation, and in fact with a review praising its greatness.
This is what makes me hate them, because they wield so much influence, but yet it’s still amateur hour over there.
That said, I have a fair number of those albums because of P-Fork reviews. This is why I hate myself.
Brando, maybe we should collaborate on a 3Bulls-Zombie-Jerk top 32 albums of the last several Years?
Andrew W.K. in the top 150. TERRIBLE album.
GREAT ALBUM.
Helped put the kid to sleep for a few months there.
Until you found Austrian Death Machine, that is.
Alas, Austrian Death Machine were far away in the future.
What is of course even worse is, leaving aside the individual ratings on albums, looking at their year end lists from a few years ago, somehow those albums aren’t necessarily still “awesome” a couple dozen months later. MEH!
The tracks were the worst. They should pick just pick bands, and then have somebody actually examine the tracks, so the track just isn’t filling a slot with the song that everyone heard in the office. Of course, since Von at Obsidian Wings piled on to Pitchfork, I am forced into bed with them. Long live Pitchforkian excellence!
I would just like to say for the record, that I mentioned Austrian Death Machine in a lecture a couple of days ago.
Was it in relation to your grading technique?
I would just like to say for the record, that I mentioned Austrian Death Machine in a lecture a couple of days ago.
This makes me feel better about mentioning them to everybody every day, but only slightly.
Screw You, Benny!
~