Welcomes Tom Breihan to Stereogum. We only ask that he attempt to top his atrocious current event reviewism at Pitchfork. Behold the master, on the new Jigga/Yeezy platter:
In the past week, Internet sleuths have pointed out that the release of many Jay-Z albums have coincided with some national or international calamity, 9/11 not excluded. Watch the Throne is no exception: its release on the same day as yet another catastrophic stock market downturn has led some critics to conclude that the pair’s boasts of obscene wealth is out of step with the times. That’s a fair case to make.
Pugsley does not try to poop so hard if he ate a gallon of cashews. How about this:
In the past week, Internet sleuths have pointed out that the release of many Jay-Z albums have coincided with some national or international calamity, 9/11 not excluded. Watch the Throne is no exception: its release on the same day as yet Robbie Keane’s signing with the LA Galaxy has led some other MLS’ team fans to conclude that the pair’s boasts of obscene wealth is out of step with the times. That’s a fair case to make.
or
In the past week, Internet sleuths have pointed out that the release of many Jay-Z albums have coincided with some national or international calamity, 9/11 not excluded. Watch the Throne is no exception: its release on the same day as yet another Carl’s Jr. mixup of a turkey burger in place of a teriyaki burger has led some eaters to conclude that the pair’s boasts of obscene wealth is out of step with the times. That’s a fair case to make.
or
In the past week, Internet sleuths have pointed out that the release of many Jay-Z albums have coincided with some national or international calamity, 9/11 not excluded. Watch the Throne is no exception: its release on the same day as yet another internet music related site hires Tom Breihan has led some blogs to conclude that the pair’s boasts of obscene wealth is out of step with the times. That’s a fair case to make.
We kid!
W.T.F.
No, Kathleen, the harbinger of our new economy has not been the degradation of personal savings coupled with a hellish job market and huge swathes of people trapped in underwater real estate, topped with income inequality, it is solely the coincident dropping of the new Jay-Z/Kanye joint and a bad day at the dog track. Also, someone at Pitchfork found out they got crabs that day.
this is like Sunday Morning Talk Show version of a music review. I suppose the debt ceiling debacle is Amy Winehouse’s fault? some critics say…
I knew there was something else bad I wasn’t linking to Jay-Z. Actually, it’s these guys fault for getting their EP reviewed so shortly after we lost Amy. WHAT ARE THE ODDS?
I stepped on a crack and broke my mother’s back the same day Bjork released Vespertine. I blame Al Gore.
In the past week, Internet sleuths have pointed out that the release of many Jay-Z albums have coincided with some national or international calamity, 9/11 not excluded. Watch the Throne is no exception: its release on the same day as a baby cardinal left the nest to early has led its parents to conclude that the pair’s boasts of obscene wealth is out of step with the times. That’s a fair case to make.
~
In the past week, Internet sleuths have pointed out that the release of many Jay-Z albums have coincided with some national or international calamity, 9/11 not excluded. Watch the Throne is no exception: its release on the same day as Matthew Yglesias cashed his paycheck for blogging leads us to conclude that the pair’s boasts of obscene wealth is out of step with the times. That’s a fair case to make.
Oh wait, that is a fair case to make.
conclude that the pair’s boasts of obscene wealth is out of step with the times.
yeah, not like the banksters and Wall Street goons, who are totally humble about their foul lucre.
zrm is out of order.
You’re supposed to mention something like ‘the same day the squirrels retook my attic’, or some such.
~
yeah, not like the banksters and Wall Street goons, who are totally humble about their foul lucre.
and they can’t rap for shit
and they can’t rap for shit
I read that as “they can’t crap for shit,” which is really funny.
Fowl Looker scoffs at all of you.
~
Where is 3Bulls?!!
Hot Dog Flavored potato chip
WHY AM I FIND OUT ABOUT THIS FROM LAUGHING SQUID??!!!
INSULT TO INJURY
We don’t have those. AND BY THOSE I MEAN 7-11. When I was in SD hanging out near Felicia Day and Comic-Con, I got a million slurpees and I can say I did not see those.
I saw these.
you do not have 7-11? I can’t…I don’t even….
somehow this is Jay-Z’s fault
the fact that it has been over 100 degrees for the last, I don’t know, 30 days and we don’t have 7-11 has led some critics to conclude that the pair’s boasts of Hermes slurpee cups and platinum spoon straws to be out of steps with my ability to cool myself. That’s a fair case to make.
Somehow I loved Sonic when it was hard to get to, but I feel like I can’t have 2-3 cream slushes a day, and the 30% chance I can taste the styrofoam in the cup kind of makes me gunshy. Whereas the delicious Slurpee- it is like my youth in frozen form, and now like my youth, is gone.
Sorry- 33/34 days. The last 25 or so.
your brain is so fried you can’t even count past 20
WORDS OF WISDOM
(Dick Cheney is so evil)…his favorite thanksgiving day meal is a babpupten, which is a baby, stuffed inside a puppy stuffed inside a kitten.
Yosef
this still leads as pretty much the awesomest thing ever on the internets and makes me laugh every time.
Where the cheetos is Yosef.
“I just got bored with people arguing on the internet”-Yosef
So, what does that mean, you have a happy full life in humanistan?????????
Curse your successful reality!
Slurpees were awesome for getting icepick-in-the-forehead-ache.
~
Slurpees were awesome for getting icepick-in-the-forehead-ache.
So was babysitting alone in the house.
oh dear yosef! come back, we shall never argue, and now you can make fun of joe biden instead!
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Google translate = WIN