New York Ad Agency Internal Memo
RE: Bushmaster account
Looking for pull quotes for the new .223/AR-15 ad-
Reached out the John “DC Sniper” Muhammad’s people- they say he’s unavailable? Anyone have a cell number? Maybe we can cross market with Chevy on tricked out Caprices. What is Malvo doing?
Trying to track down Lanza- looks like he’s a no go either.
Can we get this NY guy? He’s a pretty hot commodity right now.
Just so much to work with on this account- just no idea which way to go.
Spitballs:
Dr. Pepper 10 style ironic- “Bushmaster- it’s just for hunting”- could get laughs.
Possible musical angles: Bodycount? “Cop killer”? (can we change this to “kid” or “fireman” for niche marketing???)
What about St. Peter/Pearly gates thing- can we have him complaining about being so busy “like “goldarn Bushmaster!!”- any issues with church groups? Could be a humorous take. Maybe get Wilford Brimley? Is he still working?
Hey hey, what’s this assault rifle?
I remember asking Santa for pictures!
~
I wonder if New York Ad Agency has anything to do with New York Law Firm.
I think they might be related.
“You’ll shoot the whole town’s eyes out!”
“What about St. Peter/Pearly gates thing- can we have him complaining about being so busy like ‘goldarn Bushmaster!!’”
Or maybe the Newtown victims in heaven, lamenting the politicization of their deaths by liberals. (cf.)
I am afraid to click that, Roy.
Here’s a nice story you would appreciate from the Big Texas Honeybin Benjamin Moore Paint Dealer (maybe middle name Roy from Alabama?):
Sign above the register: “89,900,989 million firearm owners didn’t kill anyone yesterday”
I think this is a new meme- maybe the nuclear power industry can get in on this?
“n nuclear reactors did not melt down in the last two years”
“n robotic killing drones did not blow up any weddings yesterday”
“5 tons of lead paint chips were not eaten by toddlers yesterday”
This is a good one.
Oh yeah- Wellstone- I wonder when the current Pope ascends to the Prada boutique in the sky if anyone says anything about a reactionary nutjob talking about his reactionary policies upon his inevitably reactionary death. Maybe it is different when you where the Pope hat.
I think that sign might have to be a countdown clock.
15 billion cigarettes didn’t kill anyone today.
I am a bit shocked. I looked up how many cigarettes are sold per day and it really is 15 billion…
Having worked in a bar in which I was the only non-smoker that number seems low, fish.
Bushmaster – Settle that argument.
Bushmaster – Dinner WILL be ready when you get home.
Bushmaster – Better than a tricked out truck.
Bushmaster – Who needs proof when you have troof?
Not to contradict the genius but if you were the only non-smoker, then you weren’t really a non-smoker.
aif, all of my coworkers smoked, but they were not permitted to smoke inside, thanks to the LIBRUL NANNY STATE WTF OMG.
At house parties after work, you are right, I might as well have been smoking.