Why do technocratic contrarian life trolls live under bridges?

Answer: They don’t, suckers. Enjoy the aggregate slight increase in probability you won’t be ground into horse meat replacement due to the floating of a hypothetical boat- I just thought about this for one second- luckily I don’t get paid by the second, but maybe I should? MONEYBOX OUT, ZITCHES

For your musical displeasure:

Repost of our previous. (Lyrics at the link-o)

Matthew Yglesias Battle Rap Demo

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Matthew Yglesias Battle Rap Single Remix (courtesy of Mendacious D, original post here)

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The only think we fear now that the internet is disgusted with Our Matt is a backlash backlash. More mascara for the original lashes, here’s hoping they go for miles.

Why do we saw the same old with regard to Our Matt? Why do repeat ourselves?

I can’t get into the greatest nutpunches the world has received from this marginally successful yet hugely unlikeable pratfall on actual ideas and discourse. But Mattsplaining is STAGMC. Behold this recent and glistening work product. It doesn’t even make sense.

Charles and David Koch are reporting considering buying the Tribune Company (owners of the L.A. Times, the Chicago Tribune, the Baltimore Sun, and others) prompting a great Garance Franke-Ruta piece on why big city newspapers’ editorial staffs invariably lean left.

That said, I don’t see this as reason for skepticism about the merits of the Koch venture. It’s actually why it makes sense. The “liberal media” is, as Franke-Ruta argues, largely a product of the free market. Certain niches—talk radio and cable television—are very friendly to a conservative editorial product but others are not. Which is exactly why what conservative media needs is a couple of extremely rich people to buy a newspaper company and lose a ton of money building a great conservative media product.

After all, the big problem with right-leaning media in America isn’t that it doesn’t exist. It’s that it’s terrible. There is a large audience out there that’s so frustrated with the vile MSM that it’s happy to lap up cheaply produced content from Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity, and you can make lots of money serving that kind of thing up. By contrast, to build a great media company that’s top-to-bottom staffed with conservatives is going to be very expensive. The possible talent pool of great reporters is tilted toward liberals. The talent pool of great photographers and graphic designers is probably even more tilted toward liberals. Finding the great conservatives out there and hiring them is going to be relatively costly, and there’s no real economic point to doing so. Is your much worse cost structure going to get you a larger audience than Rush? No, it won’t. It’s a bad bet.
But the Kochs have plenty of money. If they want to see it happen, they can make it happen. And America would be better off for it.

8 Responses to “Why do technocratic contrarian life trolls live under bridges?”


  • “This is the stupidest thing you’ve written since the last thing you wrote, Matty Y.”
    ~

  • Maa-T-Why’s rap shit is da bomb, but I wish he’d focus a little more on ballads, especially like the sad ones he does about emus who have gone astray.

  • The choice is yours
    life’s what you make it
    but choose wisely
    you can be a star, kid
    depending on The Market
    choosing either art or lit
    you’ll be asking for fries with it
    that’s what you deserve
    don’t blame me
    my choice was great
    I write for Slate

    Heartbreaking.

  • Ooops, sorry, didn’t see the mistake until just now. My previous comment should have read “…but I wish he’d focus a little more on ballads, especially like the sad ones he does about emus who have gone astray lost their minds.”

  • “I write for Slate.” I wish I had a dollar for every time that showed up in a suicide note or a police interrogation.

  • Or title cards for Instagram-created snuff films.

  • Not that I would ever watch an Istagram-created snuff film. That would be wrong.

    [wink wink]

    P.S. I’ve gotten the math quiz right every time! That puts me in such a good mood. I’m going to go next door and drink for a while.

  • What a good idea.

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MATH IT UP, FUZZBALL