I need to leave this here so I can come back to it. If 3B were to hire an assistant this would be it. This is like Sunset Boulevard/Waiting for Guffman of Craigslist ads!!!!!!!
I am still really in shock. I want to STEAL this advertisement and PRODUCE it as a show on BROADWAY. I want to perform this as a one person cabaret show. I want to take this ad to THE INTERNET. And put it on YOUTUBE. I will make amazing artistic choices and I will bathe myself in your adulation!