Archive for the 'Animal Crackers' Category
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Markos, who may have been infected with something during a visit to the offices of The New Republic, has, in a six word post, revealed the real agenda behind the Mo’ Betta Democrats push of the netroots. The post is entitled War and reads:
Today, the war against birdofascism begins.
The comments are as bloodthirsty as one might expect, Democrats orange in tooth and claw. Obviously these are people for whom even being a hawk isn’t good enough — they want to conquer both the doves and the hawks, and the pelicans and whippoorwills to boot.
How long before Obama says that countries that have bird sanctuaries are equivalent to those that directly sponsor acts of birdiness?
Mammals of conscience should consider donating some fur to BOFFFo (Bring Out Fur For Fowl), who will be setting up centers to provide birds with alternate identities that may afford them the chance of being able to move about more easily in the months and years ahead. Bats who are willing to teach birds to hang upside-down and fly funny or who can help in the development of echolocation prostheses are also needed.
We have already received word that several groups of collaborationist flightless birds will be given roles as (ka)kapos by the incoming administration — the usual imperial strategy of giving power to a minority in an oppressed population to rule over the rest.
These are the last days before the machinery of oppression begins to close in. We must use our freedom while we still can. We hope those that stand with us against this existential threat will show their solidarity, joining together for mass acts of public birdiness in the days and weeks to come.
A tiny mammal is wreaking havoc in our pantry. So help me if he/she/it goes for the TJ’s Marcona Almonds. Smokey is currently pooping a stuffed monkey, while Pugsley has initiated a repeat of Poop-a-sock. So we are on tenterhooks about this. He’s zoinked socks since Poop-a-sock, but he’s been more of a hoarder, as if he knows that discomfort and indigestion are on tap, and has not seen fit to even chew. Not last night. Previously he has gone for the toe. He worked on a heel last night. We suspect there are three small pieces attempting to obstruct the inner workings of Pugsley, as opposed to one largish piece last time. We’re worried, but optimistic. Also, I loved my Met. A. Phor. last year. Good times!
Yes, I know you claim to have knewn the extent to which we blah blah. The Lord put us here to be surround by cob loggers, as we are ourselves also cob logging.
I bring you “The Devil’s Squirrel and His or Her Booty”- these pics were contemporaneous with the pimping of the Gigantic Take 5, which Dr. Squid has requested to see. I’m sorry to say I’m just clearing out everything in order.
A harmless rodent looking to abscond with some goldfish crackers????
LOOK INTO ITS BEDEVILED RED EYES! IT CRAVES THE GOVERNMENT TEAT AT WHICH TO SUCKLE FREE GOLDFISH, IT IS BUT A LIBERALLY FASCIST SQUIRREL!!! CLICK, CLICK ON THE IMAGE, MAGNIFY IF YOU DARE.
Also, speaking of Devlish Rodentiae, Johnny Americablog hilariously banned and edited P. Punko in this thread, which is not currently attached to any post. I encourage FM Asshat and the like to frolic in this secret thread with abandon. It would be nice to see the depths of obsession we’re dealing with.
good ones stink, too
sez sea slug
(haiku by Issa, tr. by Robin Gill, more here)
Nudibranchs in Indonesia:
MØØSES OF THE WORLD UNITE!
How do like them road apples, bear smear merchants??????!!!!!!
Having proven their air superiority, the bar-tailed godwits will no doubt be taking over any day now:
A female bar-tailed godwit, a large, streamlined shorebird, has touched down in New Zealand following an epic, 18,000-mile-long (29,000 km) series of flights tracked by satellite, including the longest non-stop flight recorded for a land bird.
The bird is called “E7″ by researchers. (Trends show this is likely to replace “Emily” as the most popular girl’s name by 2008.)
E7′s itinerary:
- March 17: Depart Miranda, New Zealand.
- March 25: Arrive Yalu Jiang, China. 6300 miles nonstop.
- 5 week layover. Dim sum.
- May 1: Depart China.
- May 6: Arrive Yukon-Kuskokwim River Delta, Alaska. 4500 miles nonstop.
- Spend summer in sunny Alaska, making way to Yukon Delta. Cavort with møøse.
- August 29: Depart Alaska.
- September 7: Arrive New Zealand. 7200 miles nonstop.
The last leg of E7′s journey is the most extraordinary, entailing a non-stop flight of more than eight days and a distance of 7,200 miles, the equivalent of making a roundtrip flight between New York and San Francisco, and then flying back again to San Francisco without ever touching down.
Since they are land birds, godwits like E7 can’t stop to eat or drink while flying over open-ocean. The constant flight speeds at which E7 was tracked by satellite indicate that she did not stop on land.
Godwits do not become adults until their 3rd or 4th year and many live beyond 20 years of age. If 18,000 miles is an average annual flight distance, then an adult godwit would fly some 288,000 miles in a lifetime.
There is some speculation that red-footed boobies bring godwits packets of peanuts when they pass over Hawaii. There are also rumors of negotiations to convince a pod of humpback whales to serve as a carrier battle group.
Several lawsuits have been filed by møøse seeking to suppress embarrassing photos.
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