Pandora the radio played a song that was sort of up the ol’ alley. Nothing earth-shatteringly amazing, but you know, pleasant to listen to.
Then I go read the Nick Sylvester P-fork review from 2005 and I feel so embarrassed for him. Like someone just discovered the power of the internet to just poop on the world. Just incredibly mean-spirited, trying so hard, arbitrary, and sad.
I need to leave this here so I can come back to it. If 3B were to hire an assistant this would be it. This is like Sunset Boulevard/Waiting for Guffman of Craigslist ads!!!!!!!
I am still really in shock. I want to STEAL this advertisement and PRODUCE it as a show on BROADWAY. I want to perform this as a one person cabaret show. I want to take this ad to THE INTERNET. And put it on YOUTUBE. I will make amazing artistic choices and I will bathe myself in your adulation!
I think the last time I even started it was 2012. Did I touch last years? I don’t know. I need UC for it to be fun. I have listened to almost no music this year, but I still have some good songs. Maybe this week POSTING WILL RESUME. I am happy that UC and I are on record in 2007 just completely crapping all over R. Kelly for being ultra disgusting.
In another 10 years, when Loadberg Doughpants is writing Op-Eds for the LA Times Channel, which by that time might be restricted to San Fernando Valley gas pump monitors, will he even be able to enunciate single syllable words? I can’t even handle what it is now, let alone knowing that he’ll still be going then.
Anyhow, I’ve decided that Blue Girl’s ringtone should probably be Gerry Rafferty “Baker Street” because if it were Phil, it would just be TOO emotional. I have yet to decide fish’s punishment. I think “What a Fool Believes” by Michael McDonald should be sufficient.
I think about everyone all the time and also sharing my important opinions with the world on various hot topics, but I am laid low so I slink off and do nothing. Sad example:
I hear a song on the radio and I think “HA! That is K-unit’s RINGTONE!” meaning the ring tone on my phone for when Kathleen calls, which she doesn’t and it wouldn’t matter because it isn’t even on the damn thing. But I still know what the ring tone would be for all of you former members of our happy club.
Brando and ZRM can fight over Rush, but obvs the former would get a Maiden or Priest song and the latter, well it depends. Actually I will take proposals from either and then veto and then accept the proposal pretending that I was the proposer.
Anywho, just a little taste:
plover would probably be some Yes whitelabel unreleased that I would have to transcribe from space rays.
Mandos- I was thinking something avant garde.
If MattY ever called his ring would be some battle rap demolishing him completely, and then the voicemail message would be “hey, I couldn’t pick up because ARGLE BARGLE”
thunderpants- maybe John Denver BUT JUST AS A PLACE HOLDER
Lo, did the Lord Cookie Jesus, filled with wrathful filling, look upon the Cloverhill Big Texas Honey Bun, and lo did the Lord thinketh that the pride of Cloverhill, the hubris of its bigness, the chemical nature of its Honey, the plastic of its Bun, and the Lord did smiteth out and smack the Cloverhill down. Lighting was hurled, and fires did it starteth, and rain did it pour, and trees did it toss about with willy nilly abandon.
25 minutes of insanity around 3 am Sunday morning took the form of sideways 3 inch and hour rainfall and 65 mph winds and some hail thrown in and then woke up to the emerging buzz of dozens of chainsaws removing limbs and entire trees from the sides of houses, and then read in the paper it was mostly just our neighborhood. Shape of the neighborhood or our house or happenstance saved us from the worst, but 70 foot oak just lying on a house like it was taking a nap, having uprooted and tipped over just down the block, was quite a sight. Fences halfway into the street. Large gravel rolled 50 yards down the street. Very impressive, Cookie Jesus!
I know it would be juvenile, but back in the day we would have had a caption contest with CSPAN screen shots of one Ted “Rage Salamander” Cruz.
Sorry I have not updated you constantly on Matthew Y. being a cobag- that is pretty much a daily situation.
I can’t believe we are so far flung that we cannot do choco skittles shooters and raise a little heckwagon.
Question: Guess who I thought about when this graduate student Johnny Science started chatting with me the other day and the only thing I could think was “this dude is high as a kite, hope he didn’t break any SCIENCE”?
Question: RE: weekly Cloverhill Big Texas radio report, whenever I hear an oldies song on the oldies station that plays songs that should NOT be considered OLDIES, whatsoever, and it is a song that I have never heard before I am slightly happy, because it is something old that is new. I usually ask _______ about it, who in turn asks _________, but Google solved it for me, and then when I looked it up, the song had been Number 1.
The song was this one: UPDATE RE: this song, fish probably knows the Klaus Nomi version.
Sunday, nightfall. It’s been a strange week, and the festival the week before took all the weirdos and freaks out of circulation for a fair amount of time, which made my life easier. because, of course, I was one of those weirdos and freaks. It’s not as if I can expect that sultry woman with […]