Archive for the 'Chazmo' Category

OK, I Dug Up Another Three Bulls! Mixtape Disstape Track

UPDATEWHAT DO I HAVE TO DO TO KEEP THIS POST ON THE TOP????? WHO WILL RID ME OF THIS MEDDLESOME COMMENTARIAT???? KIDDING, I LOVE YOU PEOPLES, ALSO AGAIN, FOR THE MASSIVE WAVE OF ATRIOTS (THANKS WHISKEYS), JONAH GOLDBERG DISS HERE. ALSO, Althouse diss somewhere on the site

I will post it here as an update, but first I want you guys to vote on several things:

Shall I annotate it, or would you like to try to figure out the allusions and post them in comments, or will you even listen to it at all?

I need to gauge the extent of ass required for the post and the expected ass extent of commenting you plan to extend or expend. Please do not consider the categories of this post to have any meaning.

UPDATE

Here it is, Chock Full O’ Nuts, ItEat. MP3 for those on RSS is right here:

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Press play on the little play icon. I think Kathleen will at least laugh.

It’s about a year and a half old lyrics wise, but it paints a poignant picture of certain someones.

You can link allusions in the comments, if they are even decipherable.

Example.

Who knew?

According to the future of American leadership at the Michigan State University chapter of Young Americans for Freedom (MSU-YAFNote this is not the usual conservative group that goes by YAF — the Young America’s Foundation — which is a more standard issue level of crazy. Update: Actually, according to Sadly, No!, the two YAFs are connected.), the “prissy RINOs” at Little Green Footballs are (h/t):

pro-Muslim, left-wing, politically correct, and basically a front for neoconservative foreign policy (instead of defending their culture, they want to build schools in the Anbar province). They are basically a puppet of the multiculturalists and believe that Islam is not the enemy of Western civilization and Christendom.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!

Sorry, sorry, but… “pro-Muslim“? “puppet of the multiculturalists“?

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

The MSU-YAF blog continues:

Only Bush-bots read the Little Green Footballs blog.

[…]

Many of the comments on the LGF blog are critical of Pat Buchanan, Ron Paul, and paleoconservatism. If you are not a big government, globalist, middle-class-hating, promoter of economic treason, then LGF doesn’t like you.

LGF and Al Qaeda both have something in common: they hate Western civilization and those who stand up for it.

And how do we know that LGF is in league with al-Qaeda? Because in a nodding attempt at sanity, LGF actually denounced MSU-YAF for inviting Nick Griffin, head of the British National Party (basically white-supremacist, Holocaust-denying fascists), to campus in order to “explain how multiculturalism, mass immigration, and Islam are destroying Western civilization”.

According to LGF:

In the boneheaded move of the year, conservative student group Young Americans for Freedom invited British National Party (BNP) leader Nick Griffin, a flat-out racist and Holocaust denier, to speak about the dangers of Islam at Michigan State University: Protesters shout down anti-Islam speaker at MSU.

It’s not clear from the article whether this was part of Islamofascism Awareness Week or not, but if it was, the Young Americans for Freedom have just handed the enemy a huge gift on a platter, tied up with a lovely white supremacist bow.

This, of course, means that:

[LGF] hate[s] how YAF brought in a real anti-Islam speaker.

and that LGF, as Traitors to Western Civilization, must be smashed as the left-wing scum they are!!

Snicker-it’s a doodle!

Maybe if Jillypants came over to give the boys some snugglies, they wouldn’t get munched by insatiable Chuckles. Lesson #1, when Pork Snorkeling, make sure food items are explicitly labeled as such.

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EAT ITS MUNCHIESWAGONS!

Note from PP: the boys are safe, Halloweenies pics manana.

Open Thread

Crazy week.  How ’bout you?  I’m off to shoosh a glacier on the moon- blogging conference.

Ha ha, just kidding.  AssParrot has a post I started reading yesterday, and am still reading.  Won’t you read it with me?  I hear Pynchon is pissed that AP is using up all the words.  Somehow Chazmo is involved (that’s Chazmo Johnson, folks, yeah I know, he still exists and he still needs a haircut and some VO5 hot oil).

Profiles in courage of ‘bagging

Popular requests of the adoring publico rabble rousers of this webpage have proposed, in light of the Seitz supernova, a post-o regarding our brush with web log-star f***ing.

We can now relate to you that Three Bulls! were personally responsible for the update on LGF of 8/20/05 10:12:02 pm.

Backsplatter at Sadly, No here. Wherein you will see a bajillion comment thread maintained almost wholly by your Three B favorites in action.

Chumpwaggonery here here here here, at the old site, maybe even the comments are still there (they are!)!!

HUMPDAY HIPPO BLOGGING

Sure your lesser sites may blog about their precious kittens or orchids or even slightly more dangerous animals like lions and tigers but we here at Three Bulls! bring you Africa’s deadliest wild animal! That’s right, the wild hippopotamus, as seen here at the headwaters of the Blue Nile.

(Image hosted by FLICKR)

HIPPO!

I had a little wrestle with this brute to teach him who was boss while the other faranj remained in the safety of the boat. It had been a while since the placid waters of Lake Tana had witnessed a battle as epic as ours but suffice it to say that I am now known as the King of the Hippos!! But being a good liberal, and not one to hold a grudge, I have let bygones be bygones. And I truly feel that we can learn a thing or two from our hippo friends; especially about degradation:

Hippos defecate copious amounts into the rivers and ponds in which they wallow all day and also partake of a charming ritual described by hippo experts as “dung showering.” They blow crap mixed with urine all over the place to humiliate their hippo rivals and inferiors and mark the territory around their watering hole, swishing their little tails to be sure to get plenty of coverage at nose level.

So how about we invite Chazmo and Vox Day over for a little “pool party” Three Bulls! style?!

Irony Continues to Have No Pulse

Chazmo, everyone’s favorite paranoid shroom-head let’s us know that irony continues to be lifeless. Here’s Chazzie quoting MICHAEL FUMENTO, who is not even the poor man’s version of himself (here’s the Deltoid file on Fumento), talking about James Wolcott who called LGF a Nuremburg rally of some sort. Our post here does not really explain much of anything, but if you are in the know about all of these individuals you would find it EXQUISITELY amusing. To bring in down to the level of Three Bulls!, Chazmundo has been listening to Beck, Suzy Boguss and Steely Dan, although the latter is actually expected due to possibly the worlds largest PCP-laced spliff Chaz shared with Becker and Fagen while checking out long-necked fretless Fenders on the Strip back in the day, so irony’s pulse went ba-bump, it was a push with Suzy Boguss, and it flatlined with Beck’s “Jack-Ass” only to further flatline with some Streets’ tunes.

UPDATE! Fumento takes it in his lantern jaw, also he kind of looks like Herb Tarlek! WOLCOTT

Jonah Goldberg Music Video Storyboard Part II


Since you guys LOVE this series, I’m gonna pull a Dennis the Pez and keep on rolling.

Song: “It’s a Long Way to the Top (If You Want to Rock)”-AC/DC

Jonah Goldberg: Ok Ok Ok Ok Ok Ok, picture this- I’m rolling down the highway- say the 405, I’m rolling in my pimp wagon. There are some monkeys in the backseat. The back seat is loaded with LA Times. Cue the music. Series of shots, establishing LA as the locale- Hollywood sign, the Strip, the Whiskey a Go Go, Pink’s, that place with the Beef. Other places, shots of me eatin’ awesome stuff as we roll by those food places (that goes on the vid budget, right?). Anyway, as we roll by famous libs, Babs Streisand, Michael Moore, Dabney Coleman, Fonda, etc.

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The monkeys throw LA Times ed pages at them and you can see my column as the paper flies through the air slo-mo and hits them. When it hits them, they turn into hot ZZ Top style video babes-
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and they join me in my pimp-wagon which morphs into a super huge stretch Hummer with a hot tub in the back.
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I’m totally mowing this huge French Dip and these babes are loving me and they have T-shirts that say “Michael Moore is fat” and then the bagpipes come in and Bon Scott is just totally selling it. And then we can throw a funny bit at the end with the Chazmo lookalike dude and Roger L. Simon (total Cali boys) typing on this like old 386 pc that is smoking and my column crushes them on their blogs because I’m MSM now not OSM and they are wearing bathrobes and Chaz looks all spacey

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and the hot babe that looks like:

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blows him a kiss and his head explodes. Cut it, print it, awesome.

Spike Jonze: *click*

Christopher Lydon

Take it to ’em!

We firmly support the rights of Open Source to rake OSM™ Media over the coals.

Keep clutching that pearl necklace, Chazmo.

Watch it, teh. We remain a family site. I merely wanted to alert you to the bitterness predicted over the OSM sitch. They done jumped over denial. Details all over the webs on that . Here’s what I’m in a tizzy about. Althouse snarks, Chazmo barks! Seriously Chaz, that ain’t the epitome of tastelessness. This is. (psst, teh, quick throw up a picture of Divine from Pink Flamigoes!-directed by Dan Quayle!)