Archive for the 'Pinko of Pork Records' Category

PITCHFORK COBAGGERY WATCH 2011-UNEXPECTED!!!!!!!

PCW 2011

I need to be honest, this feature is less fun for probably two reasons, one UC doesn’t make me laugh nonstop anymore, though I know he would if he could, but also that the music this last year seemed just so boring. The inexplicable and the terrible have been replaced by the sadly predictable. Minimally, if we are gonna stay in this game, we should at least bring back this feature- where the mean record store clerk gives an internal monologue for your purchases. The best part is we could all hammer our favorite albums

The 2011 Track List at Pitchfork

Previously:

2010

We previously sprung the rest of the Top Tracks of 2010 as placed on a Ritz cracker by Pitchfork back in surprisingly April. The list was here, but maybe it is so old it might 404?????

2010 Numbers 20-1

2009

Pitchfork listo here. Our previous 100-81 here. 80-61 here. 60-41 here. 40-21 here. Somebody should graph our output over the year. Diminishing returns? I think not. UC delivers! Suck it, All Music Guide!

2009 Numbers 20-1

2008

It is done.

Previous here and in links.

2008 Numbers 20-1

2007

Here, here, here, here, here.

2006

Here, here, here, here.

2011 JUST IN TIME FOR 2012! And here. we. go.

100. Thundercat “For Love (I Come Your Friend)”
PP says: The intro on this is very free-form Spinal Tap jazz odyssey. Now I am wondering if this is a Destroyer-level joke/awesome ironic/serious take on something, but now I feel like it is cool kid irony reversal, make something so uncool that you can reverse direction on a dime and declare it cool when nobody is looking, guaranteeing that you will lead the charge. My feelings on this: jazz fusion is either great forever, or mostly never, but it is one or the other, and if you can’t explain it without using the context “no, this is cool now because it isn’t cool” then it is probably just a noodly wank. Novelty mixtape trashbin material, but inoffensive.

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Oh Ian Cohen-This is a Bridge Too Far

PITCHFORK writes the Andrew W.K. apologia. WE JUST DIDN’T GET YOU ANDREW W.K.!!!! Compare to Ry Schry’s original take:

And yet, some of these ‘punk’ and ‘indie’ kids are still willing to back WK up with a number of ridiculous excuses that they deep-down know are inherently flawed. “It’s catchy” is no kind of argument. Every pop song you’ve ever truly hated is catchy. “It’s ironic” is wack, too, since there’s exactly zero irony to be had on any of I Get Wet or in WK’s motivational interviews. “It’s fun” is about the only legitimate excuse a guy could come up with– and that’s the one thing I’ll give it to warrant the .6 in the rating– but this world of music which history has graced us with is loaded with fun music. Even fun music with substance, fun music that doesn’t talk to you like you’re some kinda total dipshit that wouldn’t know Boredoms from buzzworthy. And you don’t even have to look that hard! So then, what is the excuse for a typically elitist music nerd to bow to Andrew WK’s blistering tard-rock? That’s right, folks: there isn’t one.

SHORTER SHREIBER: “YOU, READING THIS, YOU AREN’T AN IDIOT, ARE YOU? I MEAN I CLEARLY DON’T THINK YOU ARE, AND SINCE YOU AREN’T, YOU CLEARLY DON’T LIKE ANDREW W.K., DO YOU? I KNEW YOU DIDN’T. THANK GOD WE GOT PREVIEW COPIES OF THE LATEST BOREDOMS 7 INCH FROM THE FUTURE. IN FACT I HAVE BUILT A TIME MACHINE TO ENSURE THAT IT IS NEVER RELEASED AND YOU SHALL NEVER HEAR OF IT. I WILL DESCRIBE IT TO YOU IN WAYS THAT YOU SHALL NOT UNDERSTAND, BUT SURELY YOU WILL RECOGNIZE HOW MUCH IT MAKES YOU A DIPSHIT.”
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PITCHFORK *CHECK PLEASE*

Relevant

UC chastised me for participating in Le Pitchfork’s People’s List, where everyone got to vote for their favorite albums from Pitchfork’s existence. They said they’d take all the data and present it in super cool ways. Instead, they show some top 20 lists parsed by some geography and a few questions (most listened to genre). For the whole shebang they give the top 200 albums on a nice looking page and a graph where they break the thing down by albums from year with a table or so about some of the data. They just seemed like they failed. Where they succeeded is I assume some information harvesting app because they required voting through social media sites. Who knows. UC and I kind of had a group vote- we traded suggestions back and forth with arcane rules for vetoes etc.,

Suggestions for what would have been actually cool:

1) Top 1000 or even 2000 albums- nothing in the top 200 is surprising so much, but it would be interesting to know what albums were in the next pockets of interest (since there were tons of albums voted for) and a great way to remember some albums that have maybe fallen off.

2) Top write-in albums (bunch of well known albums were not in their database) UPDATE- OOPS- they did have this one. This was a little bit sad because these should have been in the database- I would have liked to see how many of the top 200 were suggested in their pages for the top rated albums- perhaps a little selection bias maybe

TOP-VOTED WRITE-IN ALBUMS
PAVEMENT BRIGHTEN THE CORNERS
REFUSED THE SHAPE OF PUNK TO COME
LAURYN HILL THE MISEDUCATION OF LAURYN HILL
BRAND NEW THE DEVIL AND GOD ARE RAGING INSIDE ME
PULP THIS IS HARDCORE
QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE RATED R
DEFTONES WHITE PONY
JAY-Z REASONABLE DOUBT
BEASTIE BOYS HELLO NASTY
PAVEMENT TERROR TWILIGHT
THE WHITE STRIPES DE STIJL
BLUR BLUR
DELTRON 3030 DELTRON 3030
OUTKAST ATLIENS
DR. DRE 2001
SLEATER-KINNEY DIG ME OUT
MUSE ORIGIN OF SYMMETRY
THE VERVE URBAN HYMNS
MUSE ABSOLUTION
JIMMY EAT WORLD CLARITY

3) Distribution of rankings for albums in the top 20 at least (kind of like how IMDB lets you look at distribution of scores for movies- and then gives some demographic breakdowns).

4) A selection of some people’s number 1s that didn’t make the top 200 and their comments. People’s comments were a nice feature. I presume they harvested a ton of comments from people on albums they love, yet they only used 10 of them. It is nice to see regular people write about stuff without trying too hard (™ Grayson Currin writing about metal, Ian Cohen writing about re-releases, maybe anyone at Pitchfork?).

5) They had one small list of albums that scored OK but had no number 1 votes. That was interesting. They could have had more breakdowns along these lines.

6) Maybe geography by state instead of two entries for NYC (holla Brooklyn!)

Musicians Dead On the Radio

There is something that always gets me when I happen to hear that a musical artist of some kind has died from a DJ who then proceeds to play a song by them. This was the very first song I heard on the radio leaving work today, having tuned to robo-oldies (recorded maybe on the moon, but with DJs, so they always throw in some sort of thing that convinces you that they were recorded on this calendar day), and today it was el DJ stating that Davy Jones had died in his same robo-current events factoid voice. He did mention that this was one of their biggest hits, and I guess it was (number one on Cashbox). Different oldies stations have different faves, so I grew up with “Last Train to Clarksville” getting the most play, then “I’m a Believer” but Smashmouth put me off that one. This station here tends to play “Daydream Believer” most of all, and maybe the other “Believer” and I guess occasionally “Pleasant Valley Sunday.” Nobody every seems to play “Valleri”. So I was confronted not really with my own mortality here, but with my parents’, as Davy Jones was essentially their age and not only that he was one of those types that had the air of forever youngness. You can really hear the Neil Diamond in this song, also lots of little bits from a number of songs, but “Cherry Cherry” is what you hear in the strum strum at the beginning and middle, but then it goes into all these other places that sound familiar and exquisitely poppy. OK maybe a little bit is I remember Davy Jones on Scooby Doo.

Definitely Nobody Expects Pitchfork Cobaggery Watch 2010 Tracks 20-1

We previously sprung the rest of the Top Tracks of 2010 as placed on a Ritz cracker by Pitchfork back in surprisingly April. The list was here, but maybe it is so old it might 404????? Just kidding, I finished the top 10 tonight. I had to get myself in shape for 2011′s list, soon to be released. UC, are you joining us?

And off we go!!!!!!!!

20. Erykah Badu “Window Seat”
Pinko Punko says:Sounds like a Erykah Badu singing over a vaguely Massive Attack “Protection”-like beat with some Quiet Storm like touches. OK but so unmemorable I forgot to do this list until November or read anything about why this song is supposedly exceptional.

UC adds:
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Three Bulls!

Welcomes Tom Breihan to Stereogum. We only ask that he attempt to top his atrocious current event reviewism at Pitchfork. Behold the master, on the new Jigga/Yeezy platter:

In the past week, Internet sleuths have pointed out that the release of many Jay-Z albums have coincided with some national or international calamity, 9/11 not excluded. Watch the Throne is no exception: its release on the same day as yet another catastrophic stock market downturn has led some critics to conclude that the pair’s boasts of obscene wealth is out of step with the times. That’s a fair case to make.

Pugsley does not try to poop so hard if he ate a gallon of cashews. How about this:

In the past week, Internet sleuths have pointed out that the release of many Jay-Z albums have coincided with some national or international calamity, 9/11 not excluded. Watch the Throne is no exception: its release on the same day as yet Robbie Keane’s signing with the LA Galaxy has led some other MLS’ team fans to conclude that the pair’s boasts of obscene wealth is out of step with the times. That’s a fair case to make.

or

In the past week, Internet sleuths have pointed out that the release of many Jay-Z albums have coincided with some national or international calamity, 9/11 not excluded. Watch the Throne is no exception: its release on the same day as yet another Carl’s Jr. mixup of a turkey burger in place of a teriyaki burger has led some eaters to conclude that the pair’s boasts of obscene wealth is out of step with the times. That’s a fair case to make.

or

In the past week, Internet sleuths have pointed out that the release of many Jay-Z albums have coincided with some national or international calamity, 9/11 not excluded. Watch the Throne is no exception: its release on the same day as yet another internet music related site hires Tom Breihan has led some blogs to conclude that the pair’s boasts of obscene wealth is out of step with the times. That’s a fair case to make.

We kid!

Nobody Expects Pitchfork Cobaggery Watch 2010 Tracks 100-21

Sit in the comfy chair. You will need it.

Special editorializing by UC. Very provocative, but less humor than usual.
Continue reading ‘Nobody Expects Pitchfork Cobaggery Watch 2010 Tracks 100-21′

Back to the B-side

Since we are wallowing in the skittlest of choco radio, which I unabashedly love- (what else can we all do around the water cooler) (apologies to our international crowd, I understand that this is deeply hurtful.)

I now propose we attempt to mine the actual eclectisism of the 3B community. Please pick 10 songs that you think represent the diversity of your likes (not your dislikes) and we shall see the true shape of our musical souls. Keeping in mind the result may be exactly the same, given that it seems unfair for the ZRM-Brando axis to not include Rush on their list.

Awfulness is Here

Here is what I propose, as you enjoy the musical soul of the 3B community, or its black emptiness, consider listening to at least 10 songs. Document these songs and we will award +1 point to someone if you skip a song that you blame them for, and +1 point to a person if you like a song that you credit them for its inclusion.

This should be the station linky!

I love everyone, and will preemptively eviscerate our taste in music as an irony shield for inevitable P-fork payback.

UPDATE

I will not officially like or skip in my version of the station, so as not to bias future arbitrary pain. I will merely note in my dear diary that I am already +1 for “Where is My Mind”-Pixies- clearly this is a credit to me (first song!).

I recommend that you do not stack the deck either!

I got lucky they are in an alternative block. I wonder when they will flip to lighter fluid?

1. Where is My Mind – Pixies (5) )(+1 for me)
2. Handlebars-Flobot sounds like white rap CAPT. TROLLYPANTS? maybe about as good but kind of funny (2) (+1 for MenD)
3. 1234 Feist kind of an overplayed skip but good (7)
4. Take Me Out-Franz Ferdinand (1)
5. Wild Life-Inxs (Kick) (1 maybe 2)
6.Occasional Demons-Jethro Tull -1 point for UC or ZRM
Ad
7. Midnight Rendevous-The Babys (these guys sound like a cross between Foreigner and maybe Rick Springfield) OMG I am dying this is a hilarious lost 80s movie montage track and I will treasure it as a category (2) Has anyone heard of this song? Does anyone OWN this song? Admit your shame. “Mid-night…Mid-night rendevouz..*hand claps*…yeah yeah” Wait- I think this is John Waite- so maybe that explains why the lead singer sounds familiar.

video here- embedding DISABLED by request of the EARTH

We need the header version of this song.

8. You Wear it Well (Early Version)-Rod Stewart- possibly a good song. I am on the fence here. I feel like it is one of those underrated overrated songs. I feel like this is a +1 to the spirit of BG, but she can eat it, so +1 to J.

9. Heartbreaker-Led Zeppelin I wonder if Pandora will respect the Living Loving Maid play through. I don’t like the solo until right up at the end.

10. Hush-Deep Purple -1 to ZRM!

I think they went to lighter fluid at number 6.

That Feeling

I don’t like it when GC fast-forwards through this commercial:

I think Goob really likes the song too. She clears shelfs happily to its sunny tune.

Full song: