Monthly Archive for December, 2011

Battle Rap Demo Test

Just checking. This appeared to leak last week to a secret server. It is just a mixtape demo. Thanks to producer Mendacious D for copping beats, fish for some couplets, and Capt. Trollypants for getting Matt Y guesting on the track. We didn’t even get to haircuts. Check the beat while my DJ revolves it, chumpwagons!

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Lyrics below the fold, but I think you should suffer through the scorched earth devastation.

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Pitchfork Cobaggery Watch throws down- e me at 3bulls/gmail. If you have any takes on any of the songs, send them along and we will include- this will allow some picking and choosing while myself and maybe my cohorts slog through the entire thing.

Is UC in this year? Seitz is gonna join in. I work on a list and we pass it back and forth, or you can just e-mail me your feelings on this business and I will add.

Also, I project that battle rap gonna street this week. Devastating.

Big Taxonomy strikes again

In a move possibly revealing their secret relationship with the Canadian Curling Association, the American Ornithological Union — a front organization if I ever saw one — is autocratically reordering the furniture of the universe. Citing “genetic” “information” from “scientists”, they have decided that snowy plovers are a distinct species, not a sub-species of Kentish plovers as previously thought, and thus must be known as Charadrius nivosus rather than Charadrius alexandrinus nivosus. This, as you may guess, causes distress, hangnails, gastroenteritis, and bureaucracy.

I would no doubt regard being declared a separate “species” as some kind of blatant eugenics program if the other Kentish plovers didn’t horde all the scones for themselves. I would also no doubt inform the AOU that I shan’t be back, if I’d ever been there. But, of course, “there” is nothing but an empty lot with emus nesting in it, as is clearly seen in the satellite photo below. Don’t be surprised if the next time they rearrange the deck chairs on the Titanic, it is to put you in one of them.

Eemuuus innn spaaaaaaace!!!


A claim has been made ON THE INTERNETS that a 3B header contest is a TINCH a TINCH to win. That it could be won as simply as kiss my hand. I tell you this internets, you’ve come to the wrong shop for anarchy, brother. And by brother I mean everyone, and by wrong I mean right.

Have at it. We triple dog infinity dare thee to win our contest! I assume that voting will be up to the usual standards.


Definitely Nobody Expects Pitchfork Cobaggery Watch 2010 Tracks 20-1

We previously sprung the rest of the Top Tracks of 2010 as placed on a Ritz cracker by Pitchfork back in surprisingly April. The list was here, but maybe it is so old it might 404????? Just kidding, I finished the top 10 tonight. I had to get myself in shape for 2011’s list, soon to be released. UC, are you joining us?

And off we go!!!!!!!!

20. Erykah Badu “Window Seat”
Pinko Punko says:Sounds like a Erykah Badu singing over a vaguely Massive Attack “Protection”-like beat with some Quiet Storm like touches. OK but so unmemorable I forgot to do this list until November or read anything about why this song is supposedly exceptional.

UC adds:
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Time to invest in ponies… ponies with nasty big pointy teeth

What an eccentric performance… (note: not safe for sanity).

And now for something that is actually not at all different but is, in fact, part two.

Five is not right out, as apparently there are going to be a total of six of these.

Libertarianism can be a lot like the divine right of kings — simple elitism dressed up in some of the moral language of the day. At least this lot admits they’re anti-democratic. Also: watch for the bit where the guy basically implies that assassinating the president would facilitate libertarian city-states seceding from the US, which somehow derives from a libertarian city-state which is effectively at war with the US being a good investment. This idea may disprove string theory as I think there are more curled up dimensions of delusion in it than can be accounted for by any physical theory proposed to date.